i wonder if anybody’s actually had feelings for me, like actually got upset or mad over little things i did and got jealous and confused over me and thought about me on a regular basis. i feel like i’m the only person that ever really cares about anyone and that nobody’s ever felt that way for me.

(Source: drinking)

daaammmnn girl are you the sun cuz you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me

(Source: troublemade)

When she sees your dick for the first time look her dead in the eye and say “it glows blue when orcs are close”

(Source: assistantt0theregionalmanager)